8 Ways to Deal with Bullies

So, I watched an episode of Catfish tonight, and I feel like it definitely got to me more than usual. Long ramble short, in the end the guy finds out that he had actually been catfished by a team of three people. One thought lead to another, and finally I realized I had never really written a post about bullying before. It’s about time! Bullying is something that really affects me, even hearing the word makes me angry. It boggles my mind, how anyone could want to hurt someone else. Definitely not wired that way. Anyways, before I get too mushy, I shall go on with my post. here is a definition I found on wiktionary.com. Not the best site I know, but I liked the definitions I found there.  


Bullying

noun

“Persistent acts intended to make life unpleasant for another person.”

wiktionary.com


The Zoey-valuated Tips Against Bullying:

THESE TIPS THAT I’M ABOUT TO TALK ABOUT ARE NOT MEANT FOR DANGEROUS SITUATIONS. IF YOU OR A LOVED ONE ARE IN DANGER, GET HELP FIRST. THESE IDEAS ARE FOR NON-DANGEROUS BULLYING SITUATIONS.

Role model – This one helps me when dealing with bully-like people. I think of that one person who in my head stands out as the ‘assertive one’. I’m sure I’ve referenced this concept before. It’s the one who you kinda sorta wanna be like, but not entirely… more like your own version of this person. Well, imagine what that person would do in your situation. Eh, voila, your role model to the rescue!

Broken record – Phrases like “Stop what you are doing” or “That’s enough” can be very useful in times like these. If it doesn’t work the first time, you can repeat. It’s like a broken record. 

Mantra – This is similar to the one above, as in it’s something to be repeated. But this time, it’s something you would repeat to yourself. Something, anything that you can use to reassure yourself that you do not deserve this type of behavior. Some examples: “I am enough” or “I am awesome”. Whatever can help you feel grounded. 

Figuring them out – You know how they say everyone has a past? Sometimes, a bully is often a bully because of their past. Now, I really want to be super clear with this… I am not saying this excuses their actions, because it doesn’t, not at all. What I’m saying, is that maybe if you look at it this way, they could possibly seem a little less intimidating? May not work, but who knows?

Getting help – Please, please don’t try doing all of this alone. Find someone, anyone at all, that you trust to help you through this. Even if it’s just a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen, this part is super important. Also, someone can actually do the above steps with you. 


There’s another issue that I really can’t leave out of this post. Another type of bullying, if you will. I dealt with this a lot when I was younger, so I can personally attest to the fact that this is one of the hardest types of bullying. You know that friend you have/had that seems to actually be mean and not exactly friend-like? These people are sometimes called frenemies.

Frenemy

noun

“Someone who pretends to be your friend, but is really your enemy.”

wiktionary.com


Zoey-valuated Tips To On How to Deal with Frenemies:

Hidden badness – Ever notice those people who are basically putting you down but with a smile on their face? Yeah, the people that try so hard to hide their meanness. Gosh, I hate people like that!

Hunch – You know how people always tell you to listen to your gut? Well, they’re exactly right! If you got that bad feeling in your gut when you’re with this person, you are probably on to something. Trust your judgments. 

Jealousy – While real friends would be happy for you when something good happens, these people would actually be jealous and upset about it. Boo!


I really hope that some of these tips can help you in some way. This topic is very important to me, and it is also extremely important that this message come across. Whoever you are, whatever you think you’ve done, whatever you’re thinking, you DO NOT deserve to ever be bullied. Ever. By anyone. Please remember that.

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One thought on “8 Ways to Deal with Bullies

  1. Bibi Maizoon

    April 1, 2017 at 1:24am

    “While real friends would be happy for you when something good happens, these people would actually be jealous and upset about it.”
    And that’s what I’ve needed to learn soo many time.

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
    • zoeyvaluatedblog

      April 1, 2017 at 1:30am

      Yes, I often have to remind myself of this, super important to remember. I hope this post will help you with it 🙂 Thanks for reading and commenting ♡

      Permalink  ⋅ Reply
  2. athomefeelin

    April 2, 2017 at 2:33pm

    Great post Zoey. Bullying is a huge problem in today’s society. All these schools have “anti-bullying” policies, but I have noticed of late in a lot of schools that if your not a “popular” kid the “anti-bullying policies” do no good. These bullying episodes are get ignored.

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
    • zoeyvaluatedblog

      April 2, 2017 at 3:22pm

      Yes, this is very true. So sad that this is still happening. Thanks so much for reading and commenting <3

      Permalink  ⋅ Reply
  3. Jackie

    May 29, 2017 at 10:15am

    Teachers of primary schools and secondary schools need to have this post as thier bible. Its starts there. And spirals out of control. I have been bullied in my whole childhool life. And i have worked in many different schools and witnessed it happen. But the agenda on teachers minds is to get grades. Not to make young people better people. So more bullys are formed and transfers over to adult life. If only i could have had this information years ago.

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
    • Author

      Zoey Schvan

      May 30, 2017 at 12:26am

      Wow, you said it all perfectly! Teachers should only teach if they really want to make their students’ lives better, that’s what it’s all about. All the schools you have worked in were very lucky to have you 🙂 Thanks so much for reading and commenting, I really appreciate it! <3

      Permalink  ⋅ Reply
  4. Candace

    June 8, 2017 at 11:53am

    I’ve seen the forenames this year after something happened to me. It was quick to see who came running and asking for all the details as opposed to the ones who asked me how I was.

    It was hard but I made a conscious decision to remove these people from my life

    Permalink  ⋅ Reply
    • Author

      Zoey Schvan

      June 9, 2017 at 12:34am

      Good for you! Ending those relationships is one of the hardestr things to go through, in my opinion. You’re amazing for having done it. This is something I need to work on. Thanks so much for your thoughts, Candace! <3

      Permalink  ⋅ Reply

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